May Sucks

Katie's tribute to Holly for her funeral.

Our dog Holly died.....she lived a long life.  We had her for eleven years and adopted her from a West Virginia animal shelter when she was approximately three years old....but anyways, everyone here has shed some tears this weekend.  Plus, there is a reason why "burying the dead" is a Corporal work of Mercy.....a 80-100 pound golden lab required a very large hole to be dug for a proper burial.

And I just realized that I somehow never managed to take any pictures of her in the past two years that weren't blurry due to her moving closer to me as I was snapping the picture.  Since I have never made "albums" on Facebook, I am having problems finding any pictures there as well.

(Remember I lost all of my pictures from 2013-2015 when all electronic devises were turned over for the investigation.)

So, the first two weeks of May now officially suck emotionally.  It will be fifteen years ago tomorrow that my Christopher died and I still miss him so much.  Some years are easier than others.  This year's anniversary is rough....fifteen years is such a big number.  I often question myself, wondering what he would advise regarding raising the kids, or the business, or other life events.....but every memory of Chris is surrounded by running, family, work and church.....so, outside of running, I just push myself to do "the family, work and church" thing.....and turn some music on and have a dance party at home since singing and dancing is my thing....and try to squeeze in a half hour here or a half hour there for reading time.....I really just try to pay what bills I can pay and keep going.  Some days it is easier to be positive than others.  Today is a rougher one since I am fighting a cold.  Even though I know I will probably be back to my normal positive self after we get through Mother's Day, it still doesn't make these first two weeks any easier.  (The Mother's Day negativity comes from the fact that Chris' plane crashed just prior to Mother's Day weekend in 2002.  I always connect Mother's Day with the plane collision.)

I wonder what Chris' thoughts would be regarding the man who almost broke the 2 hour marathon time this past weekend.  I pray for Chris' intercession with our two teenage children who are struggling to find their way in this crazy mixed up world.....yet, who today got out of bed and took their younger siblings to church while I tried to sleep off my third day with a cold and fever.  For these teenagers who helped to dig a dog hole for their dog without complaint and while trying not to cry until they could hide in their room with a new shelter dog that we crazily adopted six weeks ago after rescuing it from a busy street/McDonalds parking lot at 10:30pm.

Lucky, our new dog that was adopted 6 weeks ago.

My son Joey taught his younger sisters how to play chess this past winter  (totally NOT my thing.)  My teenage son and daughter continually choose family over being gone from home all the time.  They went to see a movie together last night and I caught them jumping on the trampoline together as well.  Joey teaching the littles to play chess led to these moments where the three littles took turns playing chess while they took their Sunday baths today.  So, when I focus on these things then I hope and pray that overall I am doing a good job.  I have one child really struggling to find their way....but pray that these are all signs that things are slowly going well.

Katie and Libby playing chess

Then Anna and Libby playing chess as well.

Please pray for the refinancing of the store.  I am suppose to officially sign a renewal contract with UPS Store corporate later this year which includes remodeling and equipment upgrades.  I will admit that signing another ten year contract after the past two years has created anxiety....along with the anxiety about being able to obtain financing......but then again, the thought of walking away from it all creates even more anxiety....what complex creatures we humans are.

Since it is still officially the Easter season in the Catholic Church I wish you all a Happy Belated Easter from our house to yours,

Easter 2017: Back Row: Jessie, Stephanie (Me), and Joey
Front Row: Katie, Libby holding the bunny, and Anna

Happy early Memorial day from our family to yours.  We have extra special plans this year that we are very excited about.  Thank you to all our Veterans and those who continue to serve to protect us from harm!!  May God bless you and protect you now and always!

Wishing you all lots of spring flowers and cherished memories,

Stephanie


P.S. This picture was taken of Chris and I back in 1999 when we moved into our first apartment in San Diego.....How young we once were......Chris, my love, please pray for us.

Chris and I, March 1999, San Diego, CA, our first apartment.